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Humor

New Project Tease

Dear friends,

I have great news to share with you! I’m embarking on a new project that you’ll hear more about very soon. It’s a culmination of all the work I’ve been doing for more than two decades, but also a complete departure from it. It will be multimedia and cross-discipline, durational and immediate, sensual but chaste, analytical but also deeply emotional. That’s all I can really say for now.

That’s because this new creative venture will be completely crowdsourced, from conception to funding to execution to presentation. Every aspect of the project will be dictated by the genius of the masses, i.e. you, my friends on social media.

Do you have an idea for a sound installation memorializing a recently demolished dive bar? Can you paint or play the viola? Willing to stand around in a gallery naked and silent for four hours? Or is your expertise in marketing and promotion? Have you always wanted to try your hand at lighting design? Can you juggle fish?

Welcome aboard!

I’m pursuing a principle of radical collaboration to achieve a true Art of the People. My artistic practice is a blank canvas for your hopes and desires. My career is in your hands. I trust you can appreciate the gamble I’m taking to celebrate your innate creativity.

I’ll admit up front I can get a little needy as a collaborator. Throughout the creative process I’ll need constant reassurance that I’m doing a good job, you believe in me, my hair looks great, etc. You can send these via private message, Instagram comment or my public email account. Let’s shoot for five of those a week.

Obviously, I’ll need financial support to see our project through to fruition. Any money you can spare (via PayPal, Venmo, GooglePay, TumblrBux, MindKoin) will help liberate us from the grotesque forces of capitalism.

Now let’s talk about what you’ll get from me. First off, you get a producer credit regardless of your level of involvement—I’ve given producer credits to five Uber drivers and a barback just this week! You’ll also get a director’s chair monogrammed with your name (still looking to crowdsource a monogrammer and a hookup on director’s chairs, hit me up!).

I’m writing you from a modest beach bungalow in Koh Samui, where I’ll remain for a few months to reflect on all of your creative contributions. To be honest, I’m already starting to feel like I’m losing the thread. Maybe the time isn’t right for this type of project? Or am I just being oversensitive? Talk me down, partner!

Whatever happens, I look forward to going on this creative journey with you.

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