it’s not all in your head

or conscience plays dress up

you think you will paint yourself monster. to see what you see.
also because of the ways you have been told you are imperfect and also because you
know this is true.
emphasis on   NOT,
on   I M,
you tongue your gums for where fangs would grow.
you do not want to be a furred thing. drool and hulk.

you decide to try villain on for size.                              monster costume unbelievable.
monster costume unavailable.
unconvincing. to yourself.
there is a black cape, however, in the back                          of your closet. you want to
try it
like it’s not a joke.
like you are shade.
like you have never spread yourself
                       open to sunlight. villain rests easy on
your shoulders.       is just slightly
                tight at the neck. villain forces you to leave
your hero badges home.
no utility belts.

you wonder what accessories go best
with this villain face.
                                                          your cheeks quiver holding
the snarl of it.
                                                                     your chest fills with the
secret of it.
until there is no room.

                         the spill, inevitable.
the remorse, true.